Going With The Ebb & Flow

Sometimes we are trying so hard to swim against the current that when we stop to look around, we're still in the same place we've been fighting to get out of, only that much more exhausted and disillusioned than when we first got there.

So what's the alternative? Do we just give up and give in?

No.

Take a moment to be still. Assess your surroundings and strategize.

There's no need to let our fight turn us into into lifeless seawood, just bobbing around after a while.

Ask yourself what is it that you're fighting so hard to get out of? 

What is it that's so bad that you need to get as far away from it as possible?

Identify it and break it down further.

Keep asking these questions over and over again, until you find yourself at the core issue - the root of your inner turmoil.

Now ask yourself where do you go from here?

Do you keep fighting and tiring yourself out?

If so, how has that been working out for you?

What's the point in reaching the life of your dreams and discovering that you're too exhausted to enjoy it?

Instead of fighting so hard against it, what can you do to work with the current so that it can take you to where you need to go?

Fighting against the current means using up all your energy,only to find yourself right where you started. This is when hopelessness and self-pity creeps in, and soon you lose focus on the journey.

Going with the current of your life does not necessarily mean that you are choosing to be complacent or in agreement with the environment you're trying to rise above from.

If anything, turning around to work with the current means that you are determined to get to your happy place alive and well, and with enough energy and zest left in you to enjoy a life that you so truly deserve.

It's about tact. It's about trusting that the difficulties you are facing are for good reason.

Let your surroundings help you to move in the right direction. 

Let your difficulties make you strong enough to carry yourself out of them.

Life is rough for the most part, and you don't have to always agree with it. But as long as your focus is on making your dream life a reality, you'll find that the current of your life, in its own unpredictable ebb and flow, will work to get you there.

Stop fighting. Be patient. Start working.

Mind & Matter

In any physical activity, more than our body, it is up to our mind to keep going. It takes great will power to push passed breaking point and conquer every obstacle. 

We may think that our legs need to be strong in order to get us over our hurdles, but our state of mind needs to be strong and healthy too if we want our legs to carry us at all. 

In order for our physical self to work at its greatest potential, our non-physical self needs to be at its best. We may have the fittest and best-looking body on the track, but if our spirit, our thoughts, and our sense of self is not as fit, we will not last very long. 

Sure we may keep going for a while, but when our muscles begin to tighten and our breath runs out, it is only our state of mind that can keep us in the race.  

We nourish our body with proteins and nutrients, drink lots of water to stay hydrated, and stretch our muscles so that they are relaxed and ready to move at record-breaking speed. 

Likewise, we must nourish our thoughts with goodness and positivity, replenish the light in our hearts with love and understanding, and stretch our minds with curiosity and knowledge. 

Our body is capable of performing great feats, pushing the boundaries to overcome obstacles and thrive. We see it daily - at sports events, on survival documentaries, in news reports on poverty and warfare. 

The human body is strong, powerful and graceful.

But just as we rely on our physical strength to carry us over our daily hurdles, so does our physical body rely on our mental and emotional strength in order to carry us over these hurdles everyday, without giving up. 

The strength, power and grace of our physical self comes from the strength, power and grace of our inner self. If we can remember this and apply it to our daily lives, there will be no obstacle too tough for us to conquer.

Understanding The Purpose Of Loss

By Dilshaad Bux. By Dilshaad Bux

By Dilshaad Bux.        By Dilshaad Bux

Have you ever thought about the similarities between loss and growth?

It may sound absurd, and impossible to compare, but this life - with all its ups and downs, and ups again - have brought me to observe, and believe, that loss is just as important for our progress as any progress. 

Loss, just like growth, is an inevitable part of life - when we are born, we lose our place of comfort, the first home we've ever known because, after 9 months, we've outgrown it and are ready for our new home. 

Likewise, every breath that we take, from our very first breath, our very first cry, is a process of loss and growth. We inhale oxygen to grow, and then lose carbon dioxide by exhaling. We let go off our first breath for the sake of the next. 

Loss, like growth, is crucial for our renewal. Milk teeth give way to stronger, more permanent teeth. Our skin cells die and fall away to make space for newer, more revitilized skin. Everything about us is about experiencing loss, and growing into a better version of ourselves through these losses. 

So why think of external loss as any different? 

We become so hopeless when we experience a loss in our lives, yet we forget to see that this loss can only be ever be good for us. 

It is only natural for loss to help us grow. A painful break up, the loss of our job, even the loss of a loved one - as difficult and impossible as it may seem to overcome at the time, loss is good for us, because it only means that we are strong enough and ready to grow yet again, and even more. 

Losing a loved one is probably the toughest form of loss that us as complex, compassionate beings can experience. The very fact that we have the power to acnowledge such loss, reflect on it, and eventually return to a normal way of life, is proof in itself of our great nature - a nature that has been granted to us from our very first breath, and that we are responsible of pursuing from every moment there on out. 

Whether loss is great or small, and whether it is inside you or outside in your environment, its purpose will always be for you to grow, yet again. 

When you experience a loss again, great or small, be sure to affirm that this is all part of your inevitable growth. Take from it what you need to learn, grow, and get that much closer to your true, great potential.

Your Diamond Self

If life were to be breathed into a diamond, this diamond would open its eyes as a woman. 

Beautiful, unbreakable. 

This is a woman. This is you. 

Women are born with so many gifts - including strength, courage, compassion, humility, and love. These are the facets of every woman's diamond self, with love being the most brilliant and admirable of them all. 

The natural traits of a woman are taken for granted by many women, and are therefore seldom respected by anyone else. Just like a diamond, we too deserve to be respected. To be respected, we must carry ourselves with grace, even on our worst days.  

Do not be deterred by your struggle. The obstacles and difficulties in your life are all part of your polishing process. Through your struggle you will discover your strengths, your gifts, your talents - your diamond self. 

We often make the mistake of believing that our difficulties are greater than us, but the truth is we already have everything we need to overcome even our greatest obstacle. 

All we have to do is keep going, keep perservering, and maintain a positive attitude no matter how difficult it may seem. 

Maintaining positivity is often a challenge, but we can work on this by being aware of the words we use in our daily activities and conversations - with others and, just as importantly, with ourselves. 

By embracing positivity we will ultimately unearth our greatness, and our true beauty will be revealed. By showering ourselves with positive actions, words and even thoughts, we will realize the great worth of our inner and outer beauty, and we will ensure that it is respected by everyone, including ourselves. 

This beauty is the only one of its kind. 

Your diamond self deserves to be protected, respected, and loved by you without limits. Only when you can truly love and respect your one-of-a-kind self, will others love and respect you too. 

As you go through this life you owe it to yourself to use every precious moment you have, and every challenge you face, to pursue your greatness and shine as the true diamond you are.

Tests Of Excellence

This life is a series of tests - every bad experience a lesson to gain tools from, every good experience a reward for our perseverance.

When we can think of life this way, we will be less concerned with what we own or how much we earn. Instead, we will focus on being good and happy.

Goodness and happiness may seem like simple concepts, and it is because of this simplicity that it is often shrugged off as unimportant. Many consider the pursuit of goodness and happiness to be a playful past-time, important only to flower-children and fairies. 

But they couldn't be more wrong. There's nothing airy-fairy about striving for goodness and happiness, because to be good and happy you have to be as tough as nails.

Everyday we are bombarded with bad news and bullies - in the workplace, in the media, and often even in our own homes. To maintain our willingness to be good and happy through all of it requires strength. So be proud of yourself for pursuinggoodness even when life feels like it's all bad, and know that you are strong beyond measure when you are able to smile at the end of a rough day.

This life is made up of tests designed especially for you, to push you out of your comfort zone and closer to your great potential. 

As with every lesson worth learning, your tests come only when you have been given all the knowledge you need to pass with excellent results. 

Reflect on the experiences you have. 

Listen to what your daily encounters teach you. 

Gather your tools, and embrace every test with strength - strength that you've been unaware of, strength that you've had all along.

No matter how difficult it may be, or how many questions you feel like you do not have answers to, don't give up. 

Don't allow failure to be an option. You were born to excel. So work hard at your excellence everyday. Practise goodness and happiness even in on your most difficult day, and reap the rewards of a life superbly lived.

I wished I was a little bit lighter

By Phemii. By Getty Images

By Phemii.           By Getty Images

Why does my reflection displease me so much? 

Why should the sun devour my complexion and leave me feeling stained?

Why am I not as fair as my mother?

Growing up with a goddess-like mother with lush thick hair and pale skin, these where the questions I asked myself. She was my ultimate idea of beauty. 

I went about my life the same way every princess with a Queen mother would, playing dress up and applying too much eye-shadow while at it. As soon as I realised that I did not look like this goddess, as soon as my eyes found my complexion and my mind noted it as dissimilar to my Queen’s, I questioned whether or not I had a face that remotely resembled beauty. You see it was before I even knew that beauty was subjective and complexion had nothing to do with it that I found my skin tone displeasing and myself not beautiful.

I grew up with a deep-seated hatred for my not-light-enough skin tone that brought me closer to my father than my mother. I was the product of a coloured and black eruption, the toss up of two races with different tones and I landed on black whichserved no bother however I did not come home looking like rooibos with milk, I looked more like coffee with not enough milk. “I did not receive enough lightness” is all I thought and all I grew up uttering to myself until it was embedded in my mind. I wished I was a little bit lighter. Through this, an inferiority complex developed in me where every girl who was lighter in complexion than me, was prettier than me. Every girl who was lighter was more desirable in my eyes because those girls were closer to my mother’s beauty than me, the darker-light skinned girl. 

When I moved to Joburg to end of my primary schooling and start with junior high, I met dark skinned girls whom I found beautiful, one of my best friends leading the pack. It would be an insult to suggest that I had never met beautiful dark skinned females however these girls where not just beautiful they had the knowledge of their beauty all over their posture right through to their walk. I was dumbfounded not by their complexion but their confidence and self-assurance in a complexion I had honestly never found desirable. It was the first time I found females who were more than ten-shades darker than my goddess, beautiful. A fair complexion was not the be-all and end-all of beauty and it seemed beauty too,danced on sunkissed skin. 

My insecurities were not cured but my subconscious had a lot of answering to do. 

When the light-skinned boom occurred and dark-skinned girls were relegated, spoken of as ‘the other’ that was when I realised just how destructive colourism really was. Even then I wished I was a little bit lighter, even then I felt displaced as a black girl. The mind is a powerful and misleading tool when not used accordingly and when it is not fed the right information. In a world where pale is pure and dark and sinister, it only made sense to pursue purity and this is where and how the poison spreads.  

Throughout my childhood, I was victim of self-imposed feelings of inadequacy planted and watered by the media but what I didn’t realise was, I was being indoctrinated into believing that I was not beautiful in my warm caramel skin. What many fail to realise is we rob our African sisters of the knowledge of their own beauty merely through repetitive comparisons in which one party is always not-as-pretty. It is all a joke until it is your daughter who bleaches her skin with harmful detergents in the aim to be lighter. It is fun and games until your sister’s self-esteem rests on the floor like her clothes as she seeks validation in all the wrong places. 

The black community needs to realize that it is one thing for the media to tell us that we are prettier when we’re lighter but a whole new ball game when we are fed the same demeaningdebris by our own people.

This Woman's Promise

In honour of the first day of National Woman's Month in South Africa, let us make a promise to ourselves as women - a promise that we will live every moment, from right now, in pursuit of self-acceptance and self-love. 

Let us promise to accept everything about our physical selves - from that bump on our nose, to the way our hair curls at the first sign of rain. 

Let us promise to honour our hands because even when they are rough from hard work, they are still soft - on our children, our partners and our fellow human beings - as they express our tenderness and our Divine ability to love.  

Let us promise to accept our non-physical selves - with all our hopes and fears, our dreams and our gifts, and the heritage that runs through our veins. 

Let us promise to celebrate our individual cultures with dignity and joy as they express a beautiful part of ourselves that has been entrusted to us, by previous generations, with love. 

There was a time when it became okay - no, extremely important - to lose who we truly are, in order to become a person that nobody can actually be. But this time has come to pass. And we, as women, have the power to ensure that this time does pass, and that history never feels the need to repeat itself again. 

When we wipe off our make up, un-do our hair, take off our high heels, and stand in front of each other, barefoot and real, with no distractions, then we will see just how beautiful we are. 

There is no such thing as the perfect woman - the perfect body, the perfect hair, the perfect lips, the perfect waistline. But there is a real woman, and she is here, standing in front of other real women, proud and excited to be who she truly is - herself. 

There is no one like you. Perfection is overrated. We are meant to stumble, fall, learn, and rise.

We are perfectly imperfect. 

All of our scars, our stretch marks, our birthmarks and bruises, are our battle scars in this beautiful life. They are testaments to our courage, our strength, and our capacity to love and to be loved, to be great and to encourage others to be great, against all odds. 

When we can accept who we are, as we are, then we will be able to accept our sisters as they are. Instead of competing against each other from a place of fear, we will work together from a place of love, we will recognize our common struggles and triumphs, and we will raise each other up. 

So, during this significant month and everyday after, let us promise ourselves that we will accept and love ourselves and our sisters as we all are, and that we will continue to pursue our great potential together, because we have been granted the privilege and the honour, not only of being human, but of being women. Strong, beautiful, courageous women.

The Virtue of Gratitude

Hearing footsteps in the corridor he knew might be those of the guards taking him away to his execution. His only bed was the hard, cold stone floor of the muggy, cramped prison cell. Not an hour passed when he was free from the constant irritation of the chains and the pain of the iron manacles cutting into his wrists and legs.


Separated from friends & fellowship, unjustly accused, brutally treated—if ever a person had a right to complain, it was this man, languishing and almost forgotten in a harsh Roman prison cell. But instead of complaints, his lips rang with words of praise and thanksgiving!
The man was the Apostle Paul—a man who had learned the meaning of true thanksgiving, even in the midst of great adversity. While he had been imprisoned in Rome, Paul wrote, “Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything" (Ephesians 5:19).
Think of it: Always giving thanks for everything—no matter the circumstances! Thanksgiving for the Apostle Paul was not a once-a-year celebration, but a daily reality that changed his life and made him a joyful person in every situation. Gratitude for Apostle Paul was not just a gesture, it was a lifestyle and in turn he went on to write 14 of the 27 books included in the New Testament, all inspired by the Spirit of God. Apostle Paul wrote that we should not let our minds dwell on negative thoughts. Instead, we should dwell on those things that are pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8). 
Nothing turns us into bitter, selfish, dissatisfied people more quickly than an ungrateful heart. And nothing will do more to restore contentment and the joy of our salvation than a true spirit of thankfulness. 
Today, ingratitude and thanklessness are far too common. Children forget to thank their parents for all that they do. Common courtesy is scorned. We take for granted the ways that others help us. Above all, we fail to thank God for His blessings.
One of the Bible’s indictments against rebellious humanity is that “although they knew God, they neither glorified Him as God nor gave thanks to Him” (Romans 1:21). An ungrateful heart is a heart that is cold toward God and indifferent to His mercy and love. It is a heart that has forgotten how dependent we are on God for everything. 
Why should we be thankful? Because God has blessed us, and we should be thankful for each blessing.
Thanking God glorifies and magnifies Him and also benefits us. The Lord doesn’t need our thanks, but we need to give it so we can become what He wants us to be: unselfish, encouraged, and confident. 
To be grateful for the good things that happen in our lives is easy, but to be grateful for all of our lives’ events – the good as well as the bad, the moments of joy as well as the moments of sorrow, the successes as well as the failures, the rewards as well as the rejections - that requires hard spiritual work. Still, we are only truly grateful people when we can say thank you to all that has brought us to the present moment. As long as we keep dividing our lives between events and people we would like to remember and those we would rather forget, we cannot claim the fullness of our beings as a gift of God to be grateful for.

Let’s not be afraid to look at everything that has brought us to where we are now and trust that we will soon see in it the guiding hand of a loving God; for the trials we face regardless of how bad they are prove our undying faith for Him – “In this [we] greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Christ” (1 Peter 1:6-7)

Tested faith brings experience. You could not have believed your own weakness if you had not been compelled to pass through the rivers; and you would never have known God’s strength if you had not been supported in the flood. Faith increases in quality, assurance, and intensity the more it is exercised with tribulation. Faith is precious, and its trial is precious too therefore give thanks.Thank God for grace in all circumstances. We should be thankful everyday, not just when we attend a church service or observe a special day of thanks. This is because there is always something to be grateful forremembering that someone out there is praying for the kind of life you have.

Hometown Glory

By Dilshaad Bux. By Dilshaad Bux

By Dilshaad Bux.        By Dilshaad Bux

One of the unsung beauties of a vacation is the feeling of being unknown and unrecognized, free to observe and absorb an ethnic energy that we would otherwise never have the opportunity to experience. 

In this way, we elevate ourselves from our small-world thinking. We expose ourselves to different ways of being, different struggles, and different examples of endurance and triumph. 

Some of the best holiday destinations in the world are not found in first-class destinations, but in third-world countries, where locals overcome the challenges of their land so much so that we find ourselves inspired by them, and we keep coming back, over and over, just so that we can feel their love and zest for life again. 

We're always seeking an escape, somewhere to go to and get lost in. We think that we can only reignite our life's spark by fleeing our own situation and getting as far away as possible, even for a little while. 

We go through our lives not seeing our own triumphs, and noticing that our own stories and struggles inspire so many around us, and keep them coming back to us, over and over again. 

We all need a vacation every now and then, but I think instead of waiting for that time to come around once a year - or once in a lifetime - we should look around ourselves, in our own environment and take the time to step out and experience our hometown as a tourist would. 

More than that, we need to look at ourselves and admire our struggles with as much awe and respect as we would with anyone else who embodies strength and endurance.  


See yourself through the eyes of a stranger. 

Experience your hometown with the bright-eyed bewilderment of a tourist. 

Recognise the strengths of your community and your self, and use this as a fuel to change all the things that you do not like about your circumstances and your surroundings. 

Make your homeground one that keeps you and everyone else coming back, over and over, to embrace your love, your light, and your ethnic energy. The world will thank you for it.

Into The Unknown

By Dilshaad Bux. By Dilshaad Bux

By Dilshaad Bux.        By Dilshaad Bux

When last did you try a new hairstyle? Cook with a different herb or spice? Wear a colour that you've never worn before? 

We feel comfortable with the familiar, we feel safe when we follow what others say is good for us. But by sticking with the masses, we rob ourselves of the opportunity to experience so much more. 

We were born for curiosity, to push our boundaries and discover the new. Our limits are dictated by our fears. They hold us back from experiencing a world that was created to be discovered. 

When we make an effort to take little steps out of our comfort zone everyday, we are stepping out of our self-limiting state of mind and taking leaps and bounds towards the greatest version of ourselves. 

Nothing great ever comes from living a life of sheer comfort. When we become too familiar with a life of safety and luxury, our fear of the unknown becomes stronger than our admiration of it, and we start to believe that it is somehow stronger and more powerful than us. 

This is not so. We are beings of rationality, intellect, and instinct - the best of creation. We have been given everything we need to survive. 

We are born to thrive. 

Use all your blessings and all your material luxuries to step out of your comfort zone and into a space that pushes you to conquer your fears and discover your true self. Only then will you unlock the door within yourself to all the greater immaterial treasures you have been blessed with. 

These treasures cannot be bought. They are already yours, and only yours. They are unlike any other, and to be worthy of them you have to prove that you are unlike any other. 

There is something greater in you that has always been protecting you and guiding you to this point of reflection and self-discovery. You owe it to yourself to pursue this feeling. 

Start today - try something new, no matter how small and insignificant it may seem. Try it in goodness and with sincerity. Try it with the intention of discovering something new and greater within yourself.

Act Like a Lady, Think Like Christ

By Jadene B.

By Jadene B.            

After watching the movie ‘Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man’ a few years ago, I examined the principles these females thought were necessary to apply to their relationships in hopes of keeping the men who pursued them. Not only did I marvel at the naivety of the amount of women who were keen on attempting the “90 day rule” or whatever other advice that was being offered, but I found it odd that most of the ladies actually believed that following a list of rules would get a man to be committed to them.The Word of God instructs that we shall "Let this mind be in (us) which is also in Christ" (Philippians 2:5).

I stopped to remind myself of the reality of this generation and the volumes of women who find themselves taking desperate measures to secure the man of their dreams.

A lot of young women have no idea what “acting like a lady” means. Society tells them that being a “Barbie” is the new beauty and being a bad b**** is the new woman’s international anthem.

However, society neglects to tell these “Barbies” that boys soon grow into men and they stop playing with toys. Clearly we can see throughout this generation that how we define what being a woman is will always be shaped by some kind of outside influence. 

Unfortunately, I can’t blame most of the young girls who idolize Nicki Minaj and Beyonce and see them as the standard of what a woman is. Frankly, we just do not have enough Christian women role models who are equipped totrain up this generation of young women like Titus 2:3-5 tells us to.

Thinking like Christ sounds boring compared to thinking like a man. I really can’t blame young women for this perception either because how can you think like anyone that you do not know. It is far easier to assume you know what guys want and how they think, rather than committing yourself to a life style of learning about Christ.

Let’s begin with an examination question. Where do you stand with your relationship with Christ? More than likely there are only two ways to answer this question. Either: 

1) You have a relationship with God; or

2) You do not have a relationship with God

Some of you reading this article may ask… “Well what about those in between?” I love God….BUT I just can’t give up my secret sin!  I’ll answer and say to you that it is impossible to be sitting on the fence. Scriptures tell us in Matthew 6:24 that “No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other.”

What Steve Harvey forgot to mention in his delightfulmovie is that most men can read your fears, insecurities, and life aspirations before you even open your mouth. 

How you carry yourself as woman. How you dress andhow you do your hair says a lot, including what you idolize. Are you consumed with getting attention from men? Are you hiding behind your career? Do you think you are unattractive? Do you think that you are very attractive and every man wants you? Or do you cherish God? Do you care about your brothers in Christ? Do you have a heart to serve others?

Don’t copy the behaviour and customs of the world but let God transform you and renew your mind so that you will know His will for you which is perfect, good and sufficientfor you!

In every situation, good or bad, always act like a lady first!By asking God to renew your mind so that you can BE like Him, THINK like Him and walk in His likeness and allowing Him to teach you His standards.
You are what you idolize so draw close to Christ daily sothat you can be all that HE is instead of constantly trying to adjusting to a superfluous image society entices you to become.

A Body Of Love

By Dilshaad Bux. By Dilshaad Bux

By Dilshaad Bux.       By Dilshaad Bux

Your body is a temple, a sacred monument that houses your soul. 

Your body is your knight in shining armor, protecting its queen from all harm. 

Your body is a vehicle, carrying your spiritual self through a material world. 

How does a priest treat his temple? 

A queen, her knight? 

Or a car collector, his beauty on four wheels? 

How do you treat your body? 

Do you fill it with junk, attack it with criticism, pinch it and pull at it? 

Or do you fill it with love, treat it with kindness, honour it for its strength and nourish it with goodness?

What we put into our body is not what we get out, because even when we neglect our body, criticize it, and deprive it of all things good, it still does not let us down.

Our body is built for survival. 

We have been blessed with reflexes and protective instincts that we aren't even aware of. Every second of every day our body is fighting off germs and toxins that we can't avoid, and poison and junk that we can avoid, but don't. 

Do we vandalise our places of worship, or do we keep them pure and clean, and filled with love and light? 

Do we hurt those who protect us, or do we praise them and honour them?

Could we live without our daily modes of transport that take us to work, carry our grocery bags, and bring us home safely?

Our body will keep working hard for us, but we shouldn't wait for it to fall before we realise its value. We need to love our body, nourish it, and do our best to stay away from everything unhealthy. We have to make a conscious effort to take care of the body we have been given.

Your body is strong, it is beautiful, and it is yours.

Honour it, respect it, and love it the way you love the One who has blessed you with it.

Trial by Fire

By Jadene B. By Getty Images

By Jadene B.          By Getty Images

Most of us have been through the trials of life. From heartbreaks to disappointments, neglect, financial hardships, worry, fear, abuse and even death. Sometimes the age old question is asked... “God, why me?”.

Why would a loving God allow us to go through these things? After all, doesn’t loving us mean he wants our lives to be easyand comfortable? 

The answer to that is simply no. Easy and comfortable does not enable growth in your life. God allows trials to befall us because quite honestly, we need them and most often than not, they hurt, but the tribulations He allows in our lives eventually find their purpose and may work in your favour. For a believer, all trials and tribulations have a divine purpose. And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope (Romans 5:3-4).

With that said,  I think the more fitting question is “Why not you?”

Would you be who you are today if you had not endured the trials? Would you be as wise, as strong, as driven?

Trials and tribulations also come with a reward. They strengthen and refine us, develop godly character and, as in all things, God’s ultimate purpose for us is for us to grow more and more into the image of His Son. Trials are designed for us to reach that goal. At some point in our lives we reach the point where we realize wholeheartedly that we are unable to fully heal from our painful past experiences unless we place the pieces of our broken hearts into the hands of the One who created It. 

For some of us that may be the place where we’ve stopped trying to control the reigns of our lives ourselves and hand them over to Him.

This will never be in vain. In Malachi 3:3, Scripture tells us that “He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver”.

The process of purifying silver involves the silversmith sitting in front of the furnace with his eyes steadily fixed on the fire, because if the time necessary for refining is exceeded in the slightest degree, the silver will be ruined. A refiner’s fire refines. It purifies. It melts the bar of silver, separates out the impurities that ruin its value and leaves the silver intact. God’s fire is a refiner’s fire.

God sees it needful to put His children into a furnace and His eyes are steadily fixed on the work of purifying, His wisdom and love both present.

The only way the Silversmith will know when process of purifying and refining is complete is when He sees His own image reflected in the silver.

The Proverbs 31 Woman

By Jadene B. By Getty Images

By Jadene B.             By Getty Images

And God said: It was not good for man to be alone so He created YOU!

Women today no longer walk in the confidence of Ultimate Artistic Design but search for confidence in the clothes she wears, the job she has or in the guy she’s dating. Standards formed by society compelling her to use media and magazines as her bible. 

But you are not her. And she is not you.

We know our differences are not a reason to be jealous, but we’re all God’s fingerprint. We are content with not looking like anybody else.

We are women of a difference status, Proverbs 31 to be exact.

Being a Proverbs 31 woman is not about being perfect, it’s about living with purpose, diligence, integrity and forgiveness. Proverbs 31 gives hope and a challenge to any modern daywoman. 

Whether it’s shoes, home décor or men, the Proverbs 31 woman chooses to surround herself with quality. She chooses a man respected and favored in his community. He is the type of man that will cherish her, value her and love her the way Godintended for her to be loved. The proverb begins by stating that an excellent wife is hard to find, but when she is found she is far more precious than jewels – all the money in the world can’t buy loyalty. She spends her days doing good unto others, starting with her husband. She is a woman of character who can be trusted (unrelated to the imagery that exists in society today characterizing females as dishonest and disloyal).

Far from the modern day caricature that modern feminism paints, she’s not afraid to get her hands dirty, she’s a friend of the economy & keeps a tight schedule. She invests wisely and is far from spend-thrift. She’s a strong woman who “opens her mouth with wisdom (v26)” and kindness; everything she does is governed by kindness, constantly putting others first. Her husband and children praise her.

Many women spend their days trying to preserve their beauty which only fades, however, Proverbs 31 concludes by pointing to this woman’s source of beauty – she feared God. She honoured Him and rejoiced in Him – He is her source of strength.

The Proverbs 31 woman strives for excellence in her Creator and does not accept mediocrity in her relationship with God.

Women, it’s time we set a new standard of beauty. GODfidence.

The Power Of Words

By Dilshaad Bux. By Dilshaad Bux

By Dilshaad Bux.        By Dilshaad Bux

Modern research tells us that the structure of water changeswhen exposed to different words and forms of sound. Aggressive words and sounds give water a swollen, distorted appearance, similar to that of polluted water. Kind words, and sounds such as classical music and prayer, transform water into what can be mistaken for diamonds and snowflakes, resembling that of fresh water in natural springs and mountain streams.

That's the power of words and sound, just on water. Our bodies are made up of at least 60% of water.

Think about this for a moment. 

What does this say about the effect of our words and tone of voice on ourselves and others?

Are we harming or healing ourselves and others?

Negative words hurt us, and positive words make us feel better. Now we know that our feelings are not just feelings. Instead, they form part of something very real and physical happening in our body. So, there will never be a good enough reason to subject ourselves to negativity. 

Every time a person exposes you to the damage of their hurtful words, they do not deserve your company, and you need to walk away. If you are the one speaking to yourself with hurtful words, then you have to acknowledge the harm you are doing to yourself. 

You have to embrace your power and make the decision to heal yourself. 

When we speak with sincere love, patience and kindness, we are lighting up every little part of ourselves and others - we are creating little streams of diamonds, flowing from the top of our heads to the tips of our toes, and back up again.

You are the words that you say to yourself, about yourself.

You are the words that you allow yourself to hear from others.

You are what you say. This is your power. Let it do great things for you and those around you.

Maintaining Perspective

By Dilshaad Bux. By Dilshaad Bux

By Dilshaad Bux.        By Dilshaad Bux

Whichever way you think of your life, that is the way it is. 

Whichever way you think of your Creator, that is the way He is. 

Whichever way you think of yourself, that is the way you are. 

Our perspective on life governs our actions. It's the reason why one person may see an impossible obstacle, while another may see an exciting opportunity - when both are in the same hot mess. 

Perspective is how we choose to see our life and our Creator. Most of all, it is how we choose to see our self. 

Our perspective will define the result of any hot mess in our life. If we believe that we will be brought down by a bad situation, then this will be true. But if we believe that we can grow from the same situation, then this too will be true.

Your perspective is your reality. 

It is normal to be knocked down every so often by our troubles. We are human. However, being human also means that we are built to survive. We are built to overcome. We are built to succeed. 

Perspective is our secret weapon. 

So, when we're down, we need to find the good in everything and focus on it with all the strength we have left. Soon enough, the good is all we'll see, and our mind and energy will be in tune with nothing but good vibes. 

We need to maintain this attitude and focus on the positive in every situation, so that the next time we're knocked down, we'll be able to lift ourselves back up before we even hit the ground.

And if you ever thought that you're not worthy of a good life, then you've never been more wrong. You were created as a treasure, out of love, by your Maker. 

You are His masterpiece. 

When you love, respect, and take care of yourself, you are loving, respecting and taking care of His creation - so you will be loved, respected and taken care of by Him, in return. 

This is yours, but only if you want it. 

It all depends on how you choose to think of this beautiful soul called you.

The Secret Life Of Bees

By Dilshaad Bux. By Dilshaad Bux

By Dilshaad Bux.        By Dilshaad Bux

In Winter, the lifespan of a worker bee is between 4 and 9 months, and in Summer, only 6 weeks. She produces 1/12 of a teaspoon of honey during her lifetime. That means it takes 12 bees to produce one teaspoon of honey.

Yet, if it wasn't for each and every worker bee, pollination of most of our crops would not occur, our natural food supply would dwindle, and life as we know it would be very different, not to mention a lot less colorful. 

Thinking about this little bee's persistance changed my perspective about myself and my being here: 

No matter how small I may feel at times, my presence does make a difference. 

I am significant. 

I do have the capacity to contribute greatly in this world. 

This little bee also made me realize that when my efforts are combined with the efforts of those around me, we become a force to be reckoned with. So, not only does my existence matter, but so does the existence and the wellbeing of my brothers and sisters. 

We are all working hard, striving for better, and anticipating the day when we can look back and be proud of all that we have accomplished. Imagine how much richer this way of life becomes when we recognize the efforts of those around us, and how they contribute to us reachig our full potential. 

The length of our life is not nearly as important as what we do with it. We have to be responsible for what we choose to do with the time we are given. One breath taken in pursuit of greatness would be better than even a century of mediocre existence. 

Just like the precious worker bee, your presence in this world makes a difference, and you are significant always. Make no mistake, you are made for something great.

Over To You

By Dilshaad Bux By Dilshaad Bux

By Dilshaad Bux         By Dilshaad Bux

Thanks to social media, we're witnessing everyone from supermodels to CEO's celebrating their imperfections, encouraging us to do the same. #nomakeup and #loveliveshere selfies reveal our natural beauty, making us smile and sometimes cringe, but all the while allowing us the chance to relate to each other through our beautifully flawed human-ness.

Our imperfections are ours, and we ought to celebrate them. 

So why don't we do the same for the imperfections that are present in our life?

Why are we so ready to blame the first person or event we can think of for everything that is wrong in our life? Why not accept our difficulties and circumstances as our own unique imperfections, and draw strength from this? 

Being able to celebrate our physical flaws as our natural beauty is a revolution, and it should not stop here. We should accept the bad choices and bad circumstances in our life as our own, embracing them as a form of beauty in themselves - a form of beauty that speaks of our sincerity, our fearlessness and, most of all, our willingness to evolve into the best version of ourselves. 

When we can accept all that is wrong in our life, we take back all the power we need to make it right. 

Our parents, our education, our friends, our enemies - nothing and no one can define the choices we make in our life. We always have the choice to make things right. 

Life is not easy a lot of the time, but you have the power to overcome difficulty all of the time. 

Stop the blame. Embrace all of your life's imperfections. Start the change. Now, it's over to you.

Understanding The Power Of Affirmation

By Dilshaad Bux. Dilshaad Bux

By Dilshaad Bux.           Dilshaad Bux

What if it were possible to have everything you've ever wanted? 

What if you could imagine something and it would materialize? 

What if I told you that these what if's are already a part of your reality? 

When we hold a particular belief about ourself, we begin to act in accordance with this belief. This impacts the way we are perceived and, more importantly, influences how others react to us. Their reaction reinforces our initial belief, reaffirming its truth. In psychology this is referred to as a self-fulfilling prophecy.

If you think that your neighbors hold a grudge for that time your dog destroyed their garden, you will almost always be cold towards them rather than cordial. As a result, they will not make an effort to befriend you. Now imagine if you believed that they are good people for not making a big deal about the unfortunate incident? The scenario plays out quite differently. 

Your thoughts have a real effect on your physical state and, ultimately, your surroundings.

This is the great power we yield in our lives. More importantly, this is the great responsibility we have toward ourselves. 

Our negative thoughts are like poison for our body, triggering stress and other health-related issues. You may think that one bad thought won't do you any harm, but if you're honest with yourself about the way it makes you feel and how it affects the decisions you make, then you'll admit that it is deeply damaging. 

We deserve to be completely and utterly fulfilled, and we can achieve this by recognizing our inherent power and accepting this responsibility as a testament to the magnificence of what it means to be human. 

When we choose to affirm positive thoughts, we choose to be the greatest version of ourselves. We choose to ignite this greatness in everyone around us. We build the life we seek, and we are prepared to do so against all odds. The power of affirmation is ours, and we owe it to ourselves to embrace this as we strive towards our wonderful purpose.